Ghost

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I’m pretty sure I’m a horrible person.

I don’t even know where to start with what happened today. Everything just kind of went *kabooooom!*

Boyfriend said something innocently not realizing I was in the middle of a panic attack. And it made it twice as bad. He said “I need you to stop.” He didn’t mean it in regards to panicking. It was over text message. He didn’t know.

But I couldn’t just stop and it make it wide because I WANTED to stop for him. I wanted to be able to do that one thing. Just….stop.

And as my panic subsided I got angry and I thought horrible thoughts about someone who has ash own himself to be kind and good and caring time and time again. Just truly awful thoughts.

I know it was thought in anger, and that I didn’t mean it, but I still feel so genuinely horrible. I don’t even know where to start making amends to someone who really has had a strong positive impact on my life. He pulled me out of a really deep depression. He got me interested in life again. Got me doing little things around the house to take care of myself. Has supported me through some really crappy weeks.

He’s held my hand while I’ve dealt with chemo and migraines and never once complained about any of it. I don’t know what I’ve done.

I know that we’ll get through this. I’m not worried that anyone is going to leave anyone else. I’m just not sure how I, myself, will figure out how to move on and be okay with myself again.

Sometimes life is really confusing and I really wish it could just be simple again. 3 jobs, cancer, and everything else that comes with being an adult. Feel like it’s all starting to slip again. Getting heavy…

Sigh….

Sorry for whining. Just need to get the thoughts out.

ATTENTION

vargasii:

THE WHITEHOUSE.GOV PETITION TO LEGALLY RECOGNISE NON-BINARY GENDERS IS ENDING ON MARCH 21ST, 2014 THIS SATURDAY.  I DONT CARE IF YOURE NOT NON-BINARY, I DONT CARE IF YOU DONT HAVE AN ACCOUNT, IT IS UNBELIEVIBLY EASY TO MAKE ONE.

MAKE AN ACCOUNT.

SIGN THE PETITION.

WE HAVE TWO DAYS.

TWO DAYS TO GET 58,000 SIGNATURES.

PLEASE REBLOG THIS POST, EVEN IF YOU HAVE ALREADY SIGNED IT.  WE NEED TO GET THE WORD OUT.

sherrocked:

sherrocked:

awesomeness2471998:

sherrocked:

My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my cat sitting by a glass of coca-cola with his paw almost touching inside of it and both of them didn’t even break eye contact with each other
I’m so done with my life

'Murica

Actually my father is Palestinian.

NO STOP REBLOGGING THIS.

(Source: amovible)

inkgeek:

stirpicus:

baby-gohma:

titles-for-tangents:

conquerorwurm:

catp0rn:

cptprocrastination:

BABIES

THOSE TINY LITTLE MEOWS OH MY GOSH SO PRECIOUS 

THE BABIES ALL THINK THEIR NAME IS “BABIES”

"Where are the beebies?"

"*mew*"

"Beebies!"

"Mew!"

I can’t stop watching this video please help

OH NO.

OH NO.

OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I still love this video.  It never fails to make me feel warm and fuzzy

melissaanelli:

afternoonsnoozebutton:

Have you heard of Ban Bossy? It’s the new initiative from Lean In and the Girl Scouts that’s trying to ban “bossy” and similar words that are used to bring down girls that are ambitious, take risks, and speak up. By changing the way we treat girls who lead, hopefully our generation will soon see more women in leadership roles. 

You can watch the 1:00 video with Beyonce, Jane Lynch, Condeleeza Rice, and Jennifer Garner here, or visit the Ban Bossy website

I have been told I’m shrill and overly ambitious.

Managers of venues at LeakyCons have condescendingly called me “hon” (and instantly regretted it, because I don’t put up with that BS. Steph Dornhelm, Maureen johnson and Matt Maggiacomo know the stories).

It has been assumed with every A/V company except the one that now has our business forever, that we simply have no idea what we’re talking about with regard to sound and production, because we are female.

I have literally had a security manager turn from discussing an issue with me to the man to my right, who was my bodyguard (see: stalking) and in no way authorized to speak on behalf of the conference, and whom he has never met before that moment - but he was male, I was female, and clearly he was the worthy recipient of information, right? I had to jump in front of the security manager’s face and remind him that *I* was his client and my femaleness was not a factor.

In short, I’ve heard ALL the code words for “you are a female in business and I can’t accept that, so I will assign negative behaviors to you where I would celebrate them in a man.” 

Bossy is one of the worst ones.

rapeculturerealities:

TW: RAPE CULTURE, VICTIM BLAMING

hairypitprincess:

ikaricrossinglines:

the thing that upsets me most here is that quite a few of these sample replies show profile photos of children. These people are raising families and kids. And for those fathers with daughters,I wonder how amusing they would find it if they knew there was at least a 1 in 4 chance of their own child being sexually assaulted or raped in her own lifetime.

A real funny joke there, dads.

This is highly disturbing

ditto

(Source: thehealthyhusky)

fandomsunite24601:

bakerstreetbabes:

moriartyhasthephonebox:

Rough drafts from BBC Sherlock…. I laughed so hard I think i peed.

I’m actually crying oh my lord [kafers]

THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HITLER WOULD SAY.

carohoku:

zubat:

This kitty accidentally stepped on a bee

image

yaoi paw

hula-hope:

fitnessluvr:

takeherawayern:

whiskersonkittens:

Things that don’t make you less of a feminist:

  • Being in a loving relationship.
  • BDSM.
  • Being submissive.
  • Wearing makeup.
  • Being a housewife.
  • Wearing dresses.
  • High heels.
  • Shaving.

Things that do make you less of a feminist:

  • Shaming women for doing any of these things.

Thank you

Yes. 10000x thank you. 

(Source: dead-lovers-sarabande)

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